However, I spent a lot of time on Chapter 3, and it paid off. I read it to the West Side Gang (my local writers' group) last night, and with a couple of places that need some tweaks, they greatly approved. I think that's significant since I was still doing a bunch of backstory and local flavor.
I've also heavily reworked the first two chapters, because they were, I have to admit, a bit shoddy. I wrote them in a hurry. No apologies- getting something down gave me a draft to improve on and got the story going.
Here's an excerpt from Chapter 3:
A few other people were seated in the restaurant, but most of the breakfast regulars had left and it was still a bit early for the lunch crowd. Two older men nodded at us as we entered. The odor of grilled hamburgers and onions hung about the room, with overtones of black coffee.
For the most part, the Pine Tree hadn’t tried very hard to keep up with the times. From past experience, Cora and I headed directly to the booth to the left of the door, but not the one by the window. I knew those vinyl benches had fewer duct tape patches than others, even though it only mattered when you slid in and out and the rolling corners of the tape caught against your pants.
Is the Pine Tree Diner in Cherry Hill like one you know?