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Sunday, May 29, 2011

Succintly Yours- Flash Fiction

I'm going to play again. I should be doing more serious things, but O well... The "extra credit" word is "glisten," and this time I wrote 140 words with the inspiration coming from this picture:



Here's my story:

  “Hey Ma! Where did you go?”
  “I looked out and the rain was glistening on the road. It reminded me that I needed to buy glitter and glue for Alyssa’s Brownie crafts, so I went to the dollar store.”
  “Why are you walking in the middle of the road?”
  “That way I can see the water glisten all around me. It reminds me of the beach.”
  “Geez, Ma! That beach vacation was 18 years ago. Alyssa goes to the community college now.”
  “Oh, Brian, you are such a joker. The Brownies meet on Tuesday afternoon.”
  “I suppose they do. Hop on, Ma. I’ll take you home and Alyssa will fix you some nice warm tea.”
  “Do I know Alyssa?”
  “Yes, Ma. Alyssa’s my daughter. Be good and ride home with me.”
  “This is exciting. Good thing I wore my slacks.”

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The prompt came from Grandma's Goulash

14 comments:

jabblog said...

Poignant and so well written.

SparkleFarkle said...

Poignant indeedy-- especially because our family had to rush to my MIL's bedside yesterday. Alzheimer's be the beast. [UPDATE: She's still with us. (Hang in there, Gram, and God bless you.) Please keep her in your prayers? Thank you so much.]

I hope that when my time comes, my last adding to the converstion does not include the words "Dollar Store." *reminded of Gram's wonderful sense of humour, chuckles to self*

anthonynorth said...

Yes, I agree, this was poignant and so well handled.

Sonia said...

jabblog had it right. Poignant is the word. This is so sad and touching. Well done.

Kay L. Davies said...

As everyone has said, poignant. Reminds me of my parents. Very sad, but we cope as this young man does, one episode at a time. Well done.
-- Kay, Alberta, Canada

Greyscale Territory said...

A very sad reality for so many, but beautifully told!

Helen said...

Very nicely done! Sometimes as we get older we live in past realities.

Pat said...

You wrote a beautifully touching story. Nice job.

Lisa Ricard Claro said...

Quite a different take than I expected, and handled with a tender touch. My heart goes out to both of them.

Akelamalu said...

What a touching story! I like it. :)

Anyes said...

such a sweet caring son! Bravo :-)

Lynette Killam said...

A sweet and tender exchange that touched my heart...nicely done..:)

Susan Fobes said...

I loved this! Like you, I should be working on another project, but...

Grandma's Goulash said...

You've conveyed a lot in that short exchange. I'm so glad you decided to play again. I wouldn't have wanted to miss this touching story.